The 14 Most Common Mistakes Parents Make According to a Psychologist

Positive education may be all the rage, but adapting good teaching methods accurately and regularly is sometimes very difficult. The proof is in these 14 mistakes most frequently made by parents, listed by psychologist Mike Leary. Mistakes that may sometimes seem trivial but whose consequences are likely to be harmful in the long term.

1- Giving them too much choice

Giving your children a choice is a good thing, but the risk is giving them too many alternatives. The risk? They might feel overwhelmed, lost in the face of this infinity of possibilities.

2- Constantly flatter them

Of course, it is normal and even advisable to compliment your child when he accomplishes something worthy. The problem is that today, we tend to cover our children with praise all day long. So much so that they end up being surprised when they are not treated like champions. Beware of the big head!

3- Wanting them to be happy at all costs

It is the goal of every parent to want their children to be happy, but it is also up to them to learn to appreciate life and its small (and big) joys. You cannot force them to be happy, nor can you make the work easier for them.

4- Overloading them with activities

Dance, music, drawing, judo, English lessons… As enriching as they may be, extracurricular activities, if there are too many of them, will not bring anything good to the child who risks cracking. Being a little bored is sometimes much more productive and it will also help them develop their creativity.

5- Spoil them too much

Giving in to every whim and satisfying your children’s every whim will not make them more fulfilled. On the contrary, it risks placing them in a situation of permanent dissatisfaction that they will try to alleviate by compulsive purchases as they grow up. A vicious spiral.

6- Put him on a pedestal

Encouraging your child to educate themselves is a good thing. Flattering their ego when they say smart things is also a good thing. But be careful not to put your child on a pedestal because they could then become arrogant and think that they are above everyone else, which would have the effect of isolating them from others.

7- Using too many unspoken things

As awkward as some questions can be (especially those involving sexuality), it is better to take the courage to talk about them rather than opt for silence. A lack of information on this subject could have much more serious or embarrassing consequences.

8- Being too critical

Like excessive praise, being too quick to criticize is very unproductive. Indeed, being raised in constant criticism and questioning would push children to strive for perfection in all areas and would lead them to feel extremely undermined when they do not achieve it.

9- Giving them too much autonomy

While it is the job of parents to make children independent, they should not abandon them to their own devices before their time. For example, a child should not cook his meals or take care of his little sister. A child is still a child and imposing too much responsibility on his fragile shoulders could be devastating.

10- Not asking them how their day was

Indeed, children don’t often talk about what they did at school. However, not asking them would be like not giving them enough attention and interest. And who knows, maybe this time, he’ll have lots of things to tell!

11- Don’t read to them

On the pretext that he is very small and cannot sit still, some parents sometimes abandon the little ritual of reading in the evening, although it is beneficial for the child. You just have to choose a time when he is calm, bedtime in particular seems quite favorable.

12- Taking away their pacifier (too early)

There always comes a time when parents realize that it is time for their child to learn to do without a pacifier. However, this does not happen overnight. It is better to first explain to him why and let him prepare for it. Otherwise, he may secretly suck his thumb and sometimes continue to do so even into adulthood.

13- Serve them again at the table

If your child has been given a sufficient portion, there is no point in asking him if he is still hungry or if he wants more. Children eat spontaneously when they are full. And serving them more generates bad eating habits.

14- Spanking

Strongly criticized in recent timesspanking and corporal punishment in general are extremely harmful to children. Upsetting, hurtful, frightening, spanking works much less well than dialogue.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to Top